Kev’s new best friend; Latham the Loomer, and Dear Prudence

5 Apr
Kevin Rudd on Novembre 2005.

Image via Wikipedia

All the Foreign Minister, former Prime Minister Kevin Rudd had to do was sit back and let Deputy Leader of the Opposition and Shadow Foreign Minister Julie Bishop do it for him.

Dump Gillard in it, that is.

An aroused and indignant Bishop, glittering eyes made famous by The Chaser boys (remember her staring contest with the garden gnome?) strafing panel and audience alike, passionately retold to an entranced crowd the circumstances that brought about Kev’s disastrous dip in the polls when as PM he backed down from the ETS.

This backdown, Bishop reminded us, was entirely due to Gillard and Wayne Swan persuading Kev to relinquish his greatest moral challenge of all time, probably on purpose so they’d have an excuse for declaring him a total loser as far as the public was concerned, a menace to the ALP‘s chances of re election, and best removed from the highest office.

That move gave the men who now have faces what they needed to chuck out a first term PM, and replace him with Australia’s First Hollow Lady.

Throughout Bishop’s retelling, Kev remained stoic, his features clouded with sorrow and pain, albeit mitigated by reflection.  Earlier, the Foreign Minister had most engagingly accepted full responsibility for what he now admits was a grave error in judgement. He might have been wrongly, even maliciously advised, but when the chips were down, he was the PM and the final decision was his to make.

Bishop’s death stare is scary, and no wonder the garden gnome fell off its table and shattered into a hundred pieces. I felt momentary sympathy for Tony Jones and American Ambassador Bleich seated either side of her  last night, on the occasions she spun round in her seat to burn through their brains with her laser gaze. Does she have a problem with her peripheral vision, I wondered out loud to my household, or is it that her powers only work when her stare is directed in a straight line?

A few in Cabinet Kev revealed, coyly resisting all Tony Jones’s efforts to provoke him into naming names, wanted the ETS killed for once and for all, and this morning on Radio National Breakfast, journalist Lenore Taylor reckoned Gillard was one of them.

Oooeeer – the First Hollow Lady gets even more closely aligned with expediency rather than morality.

I enjoyed seeing Kev’s dial again. I like his grin. He can be very likeable but he’s a complex bloke. During his brief sojourn as PM I found him at times extremely irritating especially when he apparently descended into a sleep deprived mania, just like a very young child who will not give in to the need to rest, and becomes unbearably obnoxious as a consequence.

However, he seems to have learned from that to nap, and take food and water.

Kev will always have charisma as a result of what they did to him, a fact none of the men who now have faces seem to have considered  before they dumped him. He can’t help but look far more interesting than just about anybody else in the ALP. In the morality stakes, he’s a zillion points ahead of our First Hollow Lady. His admission last night that he’d blown it with his great moral challenge only adds to the impression of a politician capable of sincere reflection, a rare beast indeed, except when they’ve aged and long left office.

He’s found a way to deal with the humiliation heaped upon him that is acceptable. The wry shrug, the laughing off, the live and learn attitude hints at an emotional intelligence sadly lacking in just about everybody else, and it seems to be sincere. He doesn’t hide the pain, but he looks as if he’s come to terms with it and is probably all the better for the experience.

But that’s not to overlook the calculated little bomb he did drop on the matter of who wanted to kill the ETS, a little bomb that will give the Opposition plenty of return ammunition for a while as they take every opportunity to point out that these would-be-killers are still there, and what does that mean, and who are they, and how can we trust anyone in that government?

Kev does make Gillard look both bad and boring, and that’s an unacceptable combination. If you’re going to be bad, you have an obligation to be interesting with it.

Speaking of which, I don’t know why anybody bothers listening to that Mark Latham whose ridiculous attack on Gillard’s child free choice renders anything else he might have to say  hardly worth listening to. Latham has no respect for anybody’s personal space, emotional and physical. This was concretely demonstrated when he loomed into the Prime Minister in a public place and asked stupid questions,and prior to that, loomed into John Howard as he attempted to enter a room Latham was leaving. He’s a loomer. He looms. it’s not attractive. He should give it up.

Prue Goward by publik15 via flickr

Then there’s Dear Prudence. Prue Goward, recently appointed NSW Minister for Families, whatever that is, has taken a nasty swipe at radio personality Jackie O for the manner in which she fed her baby.

Apparently Jackie O gave the child a bottle while simultaneously walking across a pedestrian crossing, an action Goward likened to the famous Michael Jackson moment when he dangled his little son over a balcony in Germany and subsequently earned global contempt for his fathering skills.

Why this is a concern for the Minister for Families remains a mystery to me. An over zealous commitment to her new portfolio? Is she going to focus on perceived child abuse by the rich and famous? If the mother had been a working class woman would Goward have even blinked her mascara-ed lashes?

I’m glad she wasn’t in the nursery when once, in a sleep deprived state similar to those experienced by the former PM, I accidentally stuck my fingers in the wrong jar and pasted my baby boy’s bits with Vicks Vapour Rub instead of nappy rash cream.

Soon to become a dad himself for the first time, he looked at me stunned, speechless and quite judgmentally, I thought, when I recently confessed this transgression. Too late I realised my mistake. Now I probably won’t be allowed anywhere near the new baby, but at least we know the Vicks didn’t do its daddy any damage.

9 Responses to “Kev’s new best friend; Latham the Loomer, and Dear Prudence”

  1. PAUL WALTER April 5, 2011 at 11:14 am #

    As usual some fascinatinginsights, but wont comment further just now, for need of a moment to mull them over, except:
    Goward is a belldame.
    O’s baby nursing transgression, a consequence of the corrupting influence of modernism, seems the equivalent of patting your head whilst rubbing you belly and destablising to the correct balance of the world, guaranteed to unleash mayhem and an assault on dignity and good taste. More of this from folly from younger women and the earth will slide to a tilt and we will all fall off the edge, if the sea monsters don’t get us first.
    Sheer madness.
    The Lady Catherine De Burgh has spoken and we will all retain an awe-struck silence.


  2. gerard oosterman April 5, 2011 at 9:49 pm #

    Prue would be better off concentrating not driving into mothers crossing the road.

    Bottle feeding mothers crossing the road are not safe with Prue on the road. She was booked for speeding in a 40km designated school area at Marulan for which she got booked a few years ago.


  3. PAUL WALTER April 6, 2011 at 9:44 am #

    I’ll bet they didn’t “can” her like they did poor old Einfeldt.


  4. Steve at the Pub April 6, 2011 at 5:16 pm #

    Why would she be canned? She got a speeding ticket.

    Einfeld was Convicted of Perjury, and Convicted of attempting to Pervert the Course of Justice.

    “Poor” Einfeld… ?


    • gerard oosterman April 6, 2011 at 5:49 pm #

      Still, it was pretty rough. How close at times are we all at risk of doing the same? He got two years jail for being foolish. Compare this with Bolt’s hatred expressed ad- nauseum and at great liberty?


  5. Steve at the Pub April 6, 2011 at 6:00 pm #

    Speak for yourself.
    On any day I know how close I am to committing Perjury or attempting to pervert the course of justice.

    It isn’t “foolish”, it is Criminal.


  6. gerard oosterman April 6, 2011 at 8:16 pm #


    Good for you, good for you.


  7. PAUL WALTER April 6, 2011 at 8:19 pm #

    SATP, she was specifically busted for speeding in a SCHOOL ZONE.
    Did you not read Gerard’s comment? Einfeldt copped two years at a time when thugs and burglars get a few dozen hours community service.
    Back on topic, this adventure has actually gone viral with a featured article from some one called Amity (Dimity?) at SMH’s gruesome “Essential (?) Baby” site.
    This apparently in the form of “an open letter”, a form both conservatives and rads in this crucial debate are partial to since the things seem to be flying about like confetti.
    From the thickly treacly post from this “Amityville Horror”, we not only learn that O wasn’t crossing the street “swigging a bottle of gin”, but is a “lovely girl”, according to the learned accolyte, who claims to know her personally ( must be true therefore!).
    Mind you, it’s been a tough day. I was just recovering from a severe consequent attack of ROFL, when my benighted eyes plumbed a second depth.
    This focussed on the scandal that has erupted with a private church school, where the headmistress has been hauled over the coals by irate parents for “air brushing” photos of their kids, apparently to eliminate evidence of pony-tails and ear-rings, etc for promos.
    Such are the values of marketing-exercise “Christian” schools?


  8. PAUL WALTER April 7, 2011 at 8:50 pm #

    Actually I woke up belatedly to what this is all about. Comes from the publicity department, the publicists wanted an opportunity to push their starlet and Goward’s censorious sanctimony provided a lovely opportunity to boost both O and the newspaper itself, in the wake.
    Now, it may be that some will take this writer’s recent comments as an example of mysogony and a failure to comprehend the substance and esoterica of female culture.
    I realise this, but I will enlighten further.
    Not only am I mysoginistic, but a curmudgeon and misanthropist of a quality that only comes to those who have acheived True Grumpihood.
    Above my bedstead, in place of a tiny statuette of the Virgin, is a plaque celebrating the immortal WC Fields and his saying for the ages that;
    ” a man who hates animals and children, can’t be all bad”.
    It is time SATP and me were recruited to lucrative tabloid radio as shockjocks- we are ripe for the picking.
    And yes, I HAVE had a bad day!


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